You're on 30 Day Probation

Dear Dr. Love,

I have been dating someone 700 km away from me for the last year. He has been alone for 10 years and I have regularly dated. I chose to tell him about my past in detail as he requested. In the past I had once cheated on someone once, and I am aware of why I did it - a type of revenge. Anyway back to this relationship, recently our relationship has come close to ending. For many months now he has been very opinionated about some of my pastimes, example: going to restaurants, visiting family- especially my mother. . . . .

I had decided that when these activities were a part of my life that I would keep them to myself - for me they are my choices and not for him to control. I have lied a few to avoid telling him about restaurant meals with friends and activities with my mother. I have been caught. Now the extreme - I am accused of cheating. He is sure that I have been cheating on him all along - saying that i am not in fact with family or friends but with someone else. I have tried everything to convince him otherwise and he refuses to be ok with me until I admit to cheating. What can I do. I work 7 days a week sometimes 70 hours and am free only in evenings mon- fri between 7-10 where I return home to call him everynight and we speak until we sleep. He still beleives that from 7-10 is when I do it.

I realize lying isn't right and it is hard for him to trust me - what do i do - wait it out. Now he says I am on 30 day probabtion but everynight its the same discussion me cheating. Or no discussion at all - he refuses to talk.

What can I do. I love him.

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