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Should I. . . ?
January 15, 2007 Ask Dr. Love Advice Column
I am in High school (12th grade-17 years old).
I like this one girl who lives 12 hours drive away from me. I've known her for 4 years and I've gone out with her for two months when I use to live near her. I have liked her for the past 3 years and still do. I am not even sure if she likes me more than a friend.
The thing is everything between her and me is a MEANT TO BE forever type. I am on excellent terms with her parents and she is the same with mine. We see each other usually every 6 months for about a week (summer is 3 weeks).
But I can make an effort to go more often now that I drive. We flirt with each other and have great times. I know for a FACT that right now a relationship with her no matter who the guy is, would last NO more than a couple months. I would never want to break up with her.
My question is that should I ask her out, get intimate, tell her my feelings? or should I just remain good friends with her? (then I worry that she will have a boyfriend)
I want to know if it's more beneficial in terms of eventually marriage to go out with her more than once (several times in high school and 1st/2nd year college) or should I ONLY go out with her once for a LONG time (2+ years before marriage happens) in our 3rd- 4th year college?
s it more beneficial, no difference, or would it hinder, to go out with her and break up several times for making a more serious commitment? I can move closer to her for my last year of high school if need be.
There is no formula to be followed. The only thing to follow is your heart.
Tell her everything you told me and ask her how she feels. Would she like you to move closer? Would she like you to give her room to date other guys so that she can be sure that you are right for her?
You are a very special man. She's very lucky to be loved by you. You know your heart and you're quite able to put your feelings into words.
Now go and do what you do best. Speak your heart to her.
Let me know what you both decide.
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