July 13, 1998 Ask Dr. Love Advice Column
I met a man I really care for two months ago. And, two weeks ago I had sexual intercourse with him for the first time. Keep in mind I had been abstinent for over a year prior to this. My question - after having sexual intercourse with a man are females known to cry? I ask this because after intercouse I lied in bed crying for about a good half-hour ( he was not aware). This has only happened once, but does it mean there are other emotional problems connected to my sexual experience? Possibly something from the past?
Great question. Hundreds of thousands of women ask this question of each year.
It is not uncommon for women to have strong reactions after intercourse. Some women laugh hysterically, some cry. It is all within the range of normal. Since you asked whether or not the crying is related to your past, your unconscious may be offering you a clue--sending up a flair that it wants you to heed.
I will say that crying after an unusually positive experience often indicates that a deep childhood need or wish has just been fulfilled. Hence, the tears are actually tears of great relief. It is also known that, to the unconscious mind, sex has deep meaning that extends far beyond the physical act. In fact, for many people sex symbolizes love.
So, it is conceivable that, for you, the recent sexual encounter made you experience a sense of deep love or belonging, the likes of which you yearned for as a child but never quite achieved.
In any case. Enjoy and keep crying for joy.
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