Dr. Love, I have been dating my girlfriend now for about a year. We love each other very much and see each other every day. I am very serious about her but lately some things have been bothering me and I don't know how to bring them up to her without insulting her or hurting her in anyway.
My problem is that I am not finding her as physically atractive as I once did. She doesn't seem to want to take pride in her appearance. I always try to look my best for myself and for her, but she doesn't seem find that as important as I do.
Since the start of the year I don't think I have seen her more than twice in anything other than sweat pants, jeans, or casual pants (once was a wedding). She doesn't want to do her hair 'it's only hair' is what she says. These are things that I find important and at one time I thought she did too.
I know she can look beautiful, she did when she courted me. I have tried shopping with her, which she hates, and everything I suggest doesn't fly. She is large chested and difficult to fit, so buying her anything without having her try it on doesn't work.
I have tried little hints about appearance, but if they had worked I wouldn't be seeking advice. We often talk about long term plans for the future and I don't want something so shallow-sounding to get in the way of that but lately this is something that has been eating away at me, and I hate that it bothers me.
I don't know if the problem is mine, hers, or a little of both, but I don't want to lose the woman I love. Any advice you have would be greatly appreciated.