Feeling Left Out

Dear Dr. Love: I am not the kind of person to write in for advice, but I am feeling overwhelmed and desperate. I hope that your advice can help me make the best decision for all parties involved.

I am dating a wonderful man. We have shared a wonderful nine months, and both agree that this is a one of a kind relationship. He is truly the man that I have been looking for. The problem is that he is separated from his wife, and has been for about a year and half. They have a sweet little boy together. Both mom and his son live out of state.

My boyfriend is a good father, and tries to spend as much time with his son as possible. The problem is that I am feeling left out, and screwed by his efforts to maintain his bond with his son. He tells me that all of his trips are about his son, and that he has no feelings for his soon to be ex, but he still stays at her house when he visits his son, and this has be feeling very hurt. He turns his cell phone off while he is there so he won't upset her, which means I can't contact him for days at a time. He only calls me when he manages to sneak out of the house without her knowing.

I have tried very hard to be understanding and supportive, but more than I have been is impossible. I realize that I am not top priority, and I appreciate his efforts to be a good father, but I am beginning to think I am wasting my time. He says he loves me, and that we will have a great future together as soon as he gets all of this solved, but I don't know if I am strong enough to endure more of this.

Please help if you can.

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