Afraid He Will Cheat

I have had a very LOW sex drive and not real open to New things. This led to my husband cheating, now all is good. My sex drive has become MUCH BETTER.

I guess age helped (29) now I want to tell him all the things i think about but that doesn't mean I would actully do them. HE WOULD. I'm afraid he will cheat again if I don't tell or push me into things I'm not ready for in action. HELP

Answer: 

You are in a bad situation. Your husband is blackmailing and strong arming you: either you tell him your fantasies or he'll cheat; and if you tell him, then you are afraid that he will force you to perform sexual acts that you don't feel comfortable performing.

You need to put the issue on the table. Tell him how you feel and see if he is willing to modify how he relates to you. As it stands now you are feeling frightened by a big bully. If he doesn't understand where you are coming from, then see a couples therapist together.

Tags

Add comment

CAPTCHA
This question is for testing whether you are a human visitor and to prevent automated spam submissions.

Expert Testimonials

"If anger and fighting are ruining your dream of a happy marriage, Dr. Turndorf’s conflict resolution program is for you."

-- John Gray,
Author of NY Times #1 bestseller Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

"This well-researched book offers a thorough, step-by-step program that provides tools for couples to heal even the most troubled relationships."

-- Dr. John Mack
Pulitzer Prize winning author and Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School

“This book is mandatory reading for every couple that wants to build lasting love.”

-- John Bradshaw,
Author of NY Times #1 bestseller Homecoming

"Dr. Turndorf is an amazing individual who has wonderful advice to offer men and women of all ages and in all types of relationships. Ignore her counsel at your peril!"

-- Bill Hammond III,
Winner of the Best Historical Fiction Award, 2012

"You are awesome Dr. Jamie. You really are. The best part about you is the way you translate complex psychological stuff into easy to understand and actionable insights."

-- Kajay Williams,
Producer Relationship Advice Cafe

"Let me tell you why you're extremely important now. I really believe your message is there. You're spot on. More and more people should be taking advantage of what you're offering."

-- Michael Dresser,
Syndicated Radio Host

"Good stuff. Great insight. I love your approach. Who doesn't need more healing. I love your idea of using your partner as a healing agent. That's such a great way to see your partner. You give great labels and patterns to look for. I love your method. You make it sound so easy. You have a great website with lots of great information and resources. These are the tools we all need."

-- Dr. Matt Townsend,
Host, The Matt Townsend Show